Logolicious

Let's face it, we all love to be given a reason to judge something or someone. I mean, why do you really think American Idol is so popular? Coincidentally, 'tis the season for judging logos (if we're going along with the Hockey News). What's that?? Judging logos you say?? How can I not?

There are some major problems with THN's AHL rankings. For example, they ranked a guy steering a river boat and two odd looking pigs -- excuse me, one is a hog -- above my steroid-enhanced Penguin. No, no, no. Clearly that's a mistake.

Here's a link to the original rankings. Here are mine. I'm not HTML savvy enough to yet figure out how to line up each logo with my ranking, so just refer to the image above. They go in order across. The THN ranking is placed at the end of each description for easy comparison. Check it:

1. Rochester Americans - I'm sticking with the pros on this one. It's classic. God Bless the red, white and blue. THN ranking: 1.

2. Milwaukee Admirals -- Recently re-done. It's modern, and pirates happen to be cool right now. Arr. THN ranking: 3.

3. San Antonio Rampage - I'm not going anywhere near that thing. THN ranking: 2.

4. Bridgeport Sound Tigers - Probably has the best color combo in the entire league -- although I do miss the old royal blue. Ferosh. THN ranking: 5.

5. Toronto Marlies - Pure classic - ness. Yes, I made that word up. Doesn't stray far from Papa Toronto, but it manages to be way sweeter. THN ranking: 9.

6. Houston Aeros - Retro is so in right now. THN ranking: 4.

7. Hershey Bears - Maybe you have to see Hershey play a lot to fully appreciate their logo. I think it's pretty sick. THN ranking: 18.

8. Manitoba Moose - Do you know how big moose are? And one with that face? Solid one-two punch. THN ranking: 11.

9. Philly Phantoms - For as much as I hate the Phantoms, I've always had a soft spot for their logo. The egg plant purple they use for jerseys? Not so much. THN Ranking: 20.

10. Lake Erie Monsters - Nessie? Oh wait, that's Loch Ness not Lake Erie. THN ranking: 13.

11.WBS Penguins - Maybe I'm biased here, but this Penguin was juiced up before being juiced up was cool. I'm pretty sure it could knock out some of these other logos here. THN ranking: 21.

12. Hartford Wolfpack - I automatically think AHL when I see this. I'm not sure why, but I think it's cool. THN ranking: 24.

13. Syracuse Crunch - No one can really be sure what that white thing is. THN calls it a gorilla, but I'm not even sure that's right. It looks more like a person. Abominable snowman? Whatever it is, it's completely crazy. It's also a step up from their old logo which looked like it could be a third member of the Ambiguously Gay Duo (thus making it a trio). THN ranking: 28.

14. Hamilton Bulldogs - Are you going to try and take that bone away from that dog? I didn't think so. THN ranking: 14.

15. Rockford Ice Hogs - If Disney wanted a logo for another hockey team, this is what it would look like. THN ranking: 16.

16. Portland Pirates - How old is this guy that his beard is completely grey? THN ranking: 17.

17. Norfolk Admirals - The ship is shooting pucks. Get it? Yeah, I know. Cool. Next please. THN ranking: 6.

18. Lowell Devils - The Devil himself on skates. Get me some holy water. THN ranking: 12.

19. Providence Bruins - Like father, like son. THN ranking: 22.

20. Grand Rapids Griffins - I wasn't sure where to rank this. So I just put it here. THN ranking: 10.

21. Iowa Chops - This is the scariest thing I've seen in my life. So maybe that's an exaggeration, but seriously. I'm having nightmares about this thing, and I'm not even asleep. THN ranking: 15.

22. Peoria Rivermen - A guy steering a boat and chewing on a puck. I can't imagine that's good for your teeth, but if that's your style, all the more to ya. THN ranking: 7.

23. Binghamton Senators - Looks like he's the Riverman's brother. Similar facial features. THN ranking: 27.

24. Springfield Falcons - Is the bird stealing the hockey stick or getting ready to take a shot? If the latter is true, then the set up doesn't look very promising. THN ranking: 8.

25. Chicago Wolves - Wow a vicious looking wolf. I've never seen one of those before. THN ranking: 23.

26. Manchester Monarchs - I'm bored. THN ranking: 19.

27. Worcester Sharks - Negative points for using the big club's hand-me-downs. THN Ranking: 26.

28. Quad City Flames - I bet you can't guess its NHL affiliate. THN ranking: 29.

29. Albany River Rats - I'm sorry I just can't be a fan of a rat -- sorry, a river rat -- for a team logo. And is it winking or did it lose an eye? THN ranking: 25.